Well shit, I made it to the end. Lets just hope I really do and wake up tomorrow after surgery. Morbid aren’t I? To be honest I am losing my shit with nerves, and have been trying to keep busy all day to not think about “it.” It being the massive surgery that will be cutting open my breasts and scooping them out like a cantaloupe. Graphic, love it.
But in all seriousness, tomorrow is a huge milestone for me and our family. I have made it to what I hope to be the end of my treatment. We won’t know until next week if radiation is needed, and I pray to GOD nightly that it isn’t. That would be another 6 weeks of treatment and delay the rest of my surgeries for another 6 months. I just hope and pray that tomorrow goes smoothly and there are no complications. And that I don’t yell at my mother while she’s in the hospital with me. Love you mommy.
Today I ran a bunch of errands after I saw my therapist. A girl can’t go into major surgery with a janky looking pedicure, right? Then I took my boobs to lunch, they wanted dessert but I said no. We had some quality time at Tender Greens, just talking about the good old days. I had some weird stares, but I’m used to that now.
For the rest of the day I am going to try to relax and enjoy the day. I am not going to dwell on the fact that my life forever changes tomorrow, because in fact it forever changed on May 3rd. I get a new set of boobs, ones that I have always wanted minus the cancer and expander part. I want to squeeze my two little minions as much as possible, give them baths and say goodnight to them. The hardest part of my day will be telling Asher that the doctor is finally fixing mommy’s boo boo.
Again I thank you all for following along on my journey. This is not the end of Cupcakes and Chemo, but I will probably take a break for a few days after surgery. Feel free to text, email, carrier pigeon or Facebook message me to check in. Visitors are welcome, as are CUPCAKES.
Love to you all, yes even you.
xo,
Jessie