First meds

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I left Rite Aid with 5 medications yesterday. Five. I left my orientation Monday, with a list of over the counter medications. I'm officially a pharmacy. Did you know that Claritin can help with nausea? Now you do.

Honestly, I had no instructions or was told that I'd need to take meds prior to chemo. Well, maybe I was told but I sure as hell don't remember. So here I was, with 5 bottles of REALLY important medications and no clue what to do. I mean I could have actually read the bottles and followed along, but I was too nervous to do that until I talk to someone.

I heard back from my new bestie, Paige over at my docs office. She told me to start my first medications today. Shit this is really starting. Fucking pre-meds for my pre meds?? So there I was, standing in my kitchen swallowing 8mg of dexamethasone (it's just a steroid apparently) and realization hit like a ton of bricks.

I have cancer. I have breast cancer. BREAST CANCER. I feel like hell, I'm terrified for tomorrow. I will be strong because I have to. I'm constantly asking myself why me, but I guess it's just the deck of cards I was dealt. I know that good always comes out of bad. Remember my little 9/11 story? I wouldn't be where I was with my husband and kids, had that not happened (if you don't know, I'll tell you that and my banana bread story.).

Tomorrow is the big day, infusion #1 of 6. Keep me in your thoughts tomorrow.  No, not because of the chemo but because my head will be frozen like a fucking block of ice! Google Penguin Cold Caps and you'll understand.  Here's to a good phlebotomist for a one prick IV!


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